


A Beautiful Mess

by Maddiemichelle



Category: Shameless (US), ian Gallagher and Mickey Milkovich - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-06-02 14:25:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6569830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maddiemichelle/pseuds/Maddiemichelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian's life is falling apart. His meds aren't working again and he feels totally alone. He's at a desperate and heartbreaking point in his life. Sucide is the only way out for him.<br/>It's time for everyone to finally come together and work it out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first fanfiction writing I'm doing! I'm so excited. It's in mostly Ian and mickey's point of view but a few others at thrown into it. It's also multiple Chapters right now.  
> I hope you enjoy!
> 
>  
> 
> If you have a prompt that you want me to write, let me know!  
> My tumblr is maddiemichelle92

It’s 3:30 am on a stormy Wednesday morning, the rain pelted the ground as Ian Gallagher walked through the park. Hey felt completely hopeless and completely done. His life was an absolute mess. He had broken up with his boyfriend, Caleb, so that is one more person who won’t care. It had been several months since his sister’s wedding had gone to help, at least his life wasn’t the only one in the crapper. His family wasn’t as close as they used to be, everyone was off doing their own thing. Lip was going to AA meetings, Debbie was busy taking care of Franny, Carl was always hanging out with his girlfriend and Fiona was always working. Not to mention, Frank hasn’t been heard from since they tossed him into the river. Everyone had their own shit to deal with, no one would even miss him. Ian felt like he was nothing, like he wasn’t even worth saving.  
Ian took a deep breath, clutching the pill bottle in his left hand. He made his way over to the largest cluster of trees that the park had, hoping that no one would notice him for a while. He sighed quietly and poured about 50 sleeping pills that he had into the palm of his hand and stared at them intensely. Finally, he brought his hand to his mouth and tossed the small pills towards the back of his mouth and took a big swig of water, washing them down.  
“Jesus Christ, that took more effort than I expected.” He muttered to himself as he slid his back down the tree, eventually sitting down on the soaked ground. He sighed deeply and bit his lip, his eyes closing as he felt the pills working, the toxins reeking havoc on his nervous system.  
With a small smile on his lips, Ian was finally at peace.

* * * * *

Fiona was woken by a loud knocking on the front doo, her eyes heavy with sleep. She glanced over at the clock, cursing quietly. She threw on some shorts and made her way downstairs, cursing quietly to herself. She hoped that Carl wasn’t in trouble with the law again, he had been doing so well lately.  
“Can I help you?” She asked, pushing stray hairs out of her face as she looked at that two police officers, her eyes wide.  
“We are looking for Fiona Gallagher. I’m officer Charles and this is officer Harley.” The taller of the two spoke with a soft, kind voice.  
Fiona’s eyes hardened immediately as she pressed her lips into a hard, thin line.  
“Who’s askin’?” She demanded, her shoulders hunching slightly.  
“Early this morning, there was an incident involving ian Gallagher. He’s at Mercy Hospital. We tried calling but we were unable to get a hold of anyone.” Officer Charles stated.  
Tears instantly pricked up behind her eyes, her mouth going dry. “I-I…” She stuttered out, tears now running down her face. “Lip!” She practically screamed as she rushed back into the house, searching for her purse. She could care less that she was only in sleep shorts and a tank top with no bra on. She looked a mess but she doesn’t have the time to care.  
Lip rushed down the stairs in nothing but a pair of boxers, his eyes wide and frantic. Following Lip was Carl and Debbie, their eyes darting between Fiona and the cops that stood in their living room.  
“What’s going on?” Lip asked slowly, taking in Fiona’s teary eyes before finally looking at the cops.  
Fiona shook her head, ignoring Lip’s need for answers. “Lip, you and I are going to that hospital. These officers are going to drive us. Carl and Debs, go over V’s and have her watch Franny and Liam. Get Kev to drive you.” She said quietly.  
Once Fiona and Lip went off with the cops to the hospital, Debbie and Carl went over to Kevin and Veronica’s house, quickly knocking on the door. After a few minutes, V opened the door, her eyes narrowed.  
“What do you…” She trailed off, looking at the 4 Gallagher’s in front of her. “What’s going on?” She asked quietly, ushering in Debbie, who was holding Francis in her arms and Carl, who was holding Liam’s hand.  
Debbie looked at Veronica with tears in her eyes, her body shaking slightly. “I need you to watch Liam and Franny and I need Kev to take Carl and me to the hospital.” She said, taking a deep breath before continuing. “It’s Ian. We don’t know what happened. Two cops showed up this morning and they took Lip and Fiona to Mercy.” Debbie swallowed, wiping her eyes. After Debbie finished talking, she looked over to see Kev walking down the spiral staircase.  
“I’ll watch the younger two, Kev will take you two over to Mercy.” V said as Kevin threw on his shirt and grabbed his keys.  
“Let’s go.” He said and went out the door with Carl and Debbie following him


	2. Chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Svetlana meets the Gallaghers at the hospital. 
> 
> Mickey and Svetlanas POV

Mickey opened his eyes slowly, listening to Yevgeny making quiet gurgling noises. Svetlana went out with some friends last night so that left him with the baby in his room. His room. He had been home only a few weeks but he was slowly getting back into the swing of things. No one really knew that he was home except for his brothers, Mandy, and Svetlana. He didn’t want anyone to know just yet. Apparently, a lot of things had changed when he went to prison. All of his brothers had some kind of friendly relationship with the Gallagher’s, Lana and Ian were best friends. Mandy, Ian, and her did almost everything together. And ian was a constant in Yevgeny’s life. Lana fully trusted Gallagher with the little one. Everything was weird. He was unsure if it was a good thing or a bad thing.

 

Mickey was woken out of his thoughts by a fussy Yev. The little ones arms were raised up, wanting to be held. He let out a low, deep sigh, and got out of bed, picking up his son.

 

“It’s only 6:30, kid. What are you doing up? Jesus Christ.” He muttered and got Yevgeny changed and ready for the day. Ever since he got out, his thoughts and feelings had changed about the boy. He wanted to do better, he wanted to be better for the child. He wanted more for his son than he ever had. When he was locked up, he decided that he was going to be better for his family, including his wife. If she was happy, she wouldn’t make his life so miserable.

 

********** 

 

Mickey was sitting on the couch, watching tv as Yev sat in his bouncy seat, watching Mickey. His eyes started to drop, his head leaning back against the couch.

 

“Shit, shit, fuck!” Svetlana cursed loudly from her room, her Russian accent the thickest he’s heard it in a long time. 

 

“You watch baby.” She said in a hurried voice and quickly grabbed her purse, heading for the front door. “I be back later.” She said. 

 

“No, no, fuckin’ no. You got last night. I have things I need to do today and watching the damn kid is not one of them.” Mickey said in an angry voice, staring Svetlana down. 

 

“You will watch baby! Got it? Good.” She screeched out, giving Mickey a deadly glare before quickly kissing a startled Yev on the head.

 

Mickey stared at the door where his wife just was, feeling very confused. He had never seen her like that before. She almost looked… scared? There was something in her eyes that had him on edge. 

 

He looked over at Yevgeny, a year and a half now and smiled. He looked more like Mickey than he did Svetlana. He even looked a little bit like Mandy when they were kids.

 

“Well, it looks like it will be just the two of us. Your bitch of a mom just ran out of here like a bat out of hell.” He chuckled and picked Yev up then sat back down on the couch. Him and Lana, they were on much better terms now. Yeah, he called her names and she did they same but they were family. They all looked out for each other now and that included his brothers. They were even looking for another house, one where everyone had a room. With everyone bringing in money, it was much easier on them.

 

Things had been pretty tough since he had gotten out of prison. He was learning to readjust to life, to working again, to taking care of his family. Sure, he was meaner, had more of an edge to him and had a harder exterior but who wouldn’t have that? He just needed to focus and bring in more money. 

 

Sometimes that wasn’t so easy when a certain tall red head entered his thoughts. There really wasn’t a day that went by without the Gallagher entering his mind. No one talked about him though, at least when he was around. He had heard Mandy and Iggy mention Ian. Even Lana would coo at Yev about Gallagher and he would feel a little bit of jealousy when his son’s face would light up at the mention of his ex boyfriend. He wasn’t exactly sure what the jealousy was towards, though. Mickey looked down at Yevgeny’s face, noticing that he had already fallen asleep. It was already 11:00, so maybe nap time was a good idea. He stood up, being careful not to wake the baby up and went into his room, closing the door behind him.

 

*********

 

The first person that she spotted was Fiona. Her hair was a mess and she was still in her pajamas. Her eyes were rimmed red and her cheeks were tear stained. Not good at all.

 

“What happened?” Svetlana asked and placed a hand on Fiona’s arm.

 

“He- he took a bunch of sleeping pills and sat down around a bunch of trees to die.” Fiona said, her breathing hitching. “Some teenager found him. His heart had stopped and he wasn’t breathing so the kid did CPR. Then as he got to the ER, he went into cardiac arrest again. They don’t know what kind of damage was done but he’s on life support right now. They said that they will give him a few days before they see if he is brain dead or not. Then we will go from there.” She said, looking as if she were going to burst into tears. 

 

Svetlana was at a complete loss. Everything had been going so well. Sure, Ian had broken up with that boyfriend of his but he didn’t seem all that broken up about it. He even said that he had gotten a promotion at work and wanted all of them to go to the zoo or some shit with the kids. He was so excited that he even offered to pay for them all. He had started to pay more, helping her with Yevgeny, even though she told him that they didn’t need it. He didn’t know that Mickey was back and that added another pay check to the pot. She saved the money and kept it as a “just in case” kind of thing. He was doing amazing and even had health insurance. She thought that he had his life together in that aspect.

 

“Where is everyone?” She asked and looked at Fiona. 

 

“In the caff, bringing coffee and food up here. I had Lip call Ian’s work but not tell them exactly what happened.” Fiona said and sat down on the chair in the hallway. “I don’t know what to do. I would have helped… Lip would have helped…”

 

“He felt like he had no one.” Lana said sharply as Fiona’s eyes grew wide. “No families. No Gallagher’s. We are family. His family. He had us. No you.” She said, remembering when Orange Boy would cry about not feeling like he had support from his brothers and sisters. He wanted to move back in with them but he couldn’t. Because of Mickey. But ian didn’t know that. If only she had told him that. 

 

“He wanted to move out. Felt like a burden to family. No one noticed that he didn’t want to be there at house. He felt wanted and needed and loved at Milkovich home.” She said harshly, looking into Fiona’s eyes. 

 

“Why didn’t you let him? If he wanted that so badly.” Fiona asked quietly, avoiding the Russian’s intense gaze.

 

“It… Very complicated. Mickey complicated. He’s out. Wants no one to know yet. That is why.” She said and crossed her arms, as if daring the eldest Gallagher to say something about their living situation.

 

Fiona looked like she was going to say something but kept her mouth shut as Lip, Carl, and Debbie, along with Mandy, came walking down the hall, carrying coffee and bags of food.

 

Mandy walked over to Svetlana and gave her a quick hug, her eyebrows raised. 

 

“He does not know. He home with Yev. Angry. I yelled.” She said as Mandy smirked slightly. 

 

Mandy took a seat next to Lana as the Gallagher’s went over to the nurses desk, probably asking when they could see their brother.

 

“Will you tell him? He will be angry if you keep this from him. It’s Ian. No matter what, he will want to know.” Mandy said quietly, playing with the string dangling from her shorts.

 

“I will. I go home after we see ian. I will bring Yevgeny. Baby will help him.” She said, hoping what she said would be true.

 

“We should have brought him home. We would have noticed if he were gone. They never notice. They only care about their own shit. I know how he is. He will always help but no one will help him or even notice that h needs help. On his days off, they dump Liam and Debbie’s baby on him. When he comes home from work, even if he just worked a double shift, even if someone died, they dump them on him. I only know because he texts me. He never minds, though. He suffers in silence. We should have packed up his things and brought him home. Screw Mickey. He would have gotten over it.” Mandy finishes. 

 

Svetlana didn’t say anything for a few minutes. Mandy was right. Everything she said, she was right. Now they all would be regretting their actions. If he died, God help the shit storm that Mickey would bring on them all. Especially himself. No one would survive it. Mickey most certainly wouldn’t. He would take anyone out in his path. Especially the Gallaghers. 

 

“I know. I know.” Lana said in th softest, most quite voice that she could muster.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote all of this on my phone. Very sorry for any mistakes.

Mickey could practically hear the blood rushing through his ears as he looked at Svetlana. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. It was like his whole world was crashing down on him. **Ian**.  His Ian. This wasn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to see Gallagher and they would talk and everything would go back to their normal. But only better. He learned by word of mouth, and a lot of snooping, that Ian was finally on his medication and was working as an EMT. He learned that Ian had been working on the North side but transferred back to the South side when he moved back into the Gallagher house. He had even looked into becoming a paramedic. They were both getting their shit together but now this?

 

"You listening? Orange boy is in hospital. He is on life support. Tried to off himself. Svetlana said, breaking him out of his thoughts. She may look like someone who didn't give two shits about what was happening but he could tell that she was upset. He knew that Lana didn't let many people into her world but he knew that she had let the red head into it and now she was scared about what was going to happen to him.

 

"Have you seen him? Did they let you?" Mickey asked, his face like stone. He made sure that he didn't give anything away, he kept his emotions on lock down.

 

"Yes. Eldest is angry with me. Did not like the truth. I do not care. She... No, they are on my shit list." The Russian said with a scowl on her face.

 

Now that caught his attention. "What do you mean? What went down?" He wanted to know everything. He gave her all of his attention.

 

"He wanted to move in. I told him no. He felt alone there, like no one care. I regret not let him move back in." She said then looked like she was in deep thought before she spoke again. "He help with Yevgeny. I tell him no, that we have it in control but he is stubborn. Stubborn red head. I save money from him and save for new home for us. Maybe him, too. He give me $20,000 all together. I save all. He still gives money, he last give a week ago. He take care of us, make sure Yev and me are good. He does not have to. He is good man."

 

Mickey couldn't believe it. He knew that firecrotch helped his wife and kid but until then, he didn't know how much.

 

"Well, what now?" He asked, closing his eyes tightly. He cared so much for Ian, that had never stopped. Hell, he even loved him. Sure, Ian had fucked up, but hadn't Mickey screwed shit up, too? Mickey had hurt Ian, but he had always come back to Mickey and ignored how Mickey had treated him.

 

"We go to hospital. You will see him and let him know that you are there. He needs us all now." She said, raising an eyebrow at Mickey.

 

"Okay. Anything for him." He said softly.

 

                      ************

 _"Daddy! Daddy! Wake up!" The little boy shouted, his blue eyes bright and his toothy smile wide_.

 

_"Woah there. Be careful, little man." Ian said and smiled down at his son. "Where's papa? Where's mama?" He asked as Yev grinned and slid under the covers, snuggling into Ian._

 

 _"Making breakfast. Papa told me to come and wake you up. He's making pancakes and bacon. Oh and an omelet for you." Yev said, making a grossed out face_.

 

_Ian grinned wide and rubbed Yevgeny's back slowly, listening to him. "Okay, okay, okay. Let's go have some yummy breakfast!" He coped and climbed out of bed, helping their son up then he finally made the bed, with Yev's help, of course._

 

 _Once they got down to the kitchen, Ian set the little boy down and went over to his husband, giving his shoulder a soft kiss. "What's cookin' good lookin'?" He asked and smacked Mickey's ass, smirking slightly_.

 

 _Mickey rolled his eyes and flipped a pancake."You're a fuckin' dick, you know that?" He teased and turned off the stove, bringing their food to the table_.

 

 _"Hey Lana." Ian said and walked over to the Raven beauty, gently nudging her shoulder_.

 

" _May I?" He asked. Svetlana chuckled and nodded, smirking at the ginger. Ian leaned down and placed his hands over her stomach, making cooing sounds at her swollen tummy. "Are you being a good baby for mama?" He asked, gently rubbing her stomach. "Oh yes you are, you're such a lovely baby." He cooed before he gently placed a kiss on her swollen abdomen._

 

 _They finally got their shit together. This was the life that they all had wanted. Ian worked hard to get his bipolar disorder under control and he worked hard to become a paramedic. Mickey had come so far and Ian was so proud. He became a better father to Yevgeny and he didn't have to hound his husband anymore about taking care of the little boy. He and Svetlana divorced a few years ago but she and Yev still lived with him and Mickey. Yevgeny was getting older and Ian missed having a baby around. All three of them decided that Lana would be their surrogate_.

 

 _"Come on Yev, let's eat." He grabbed Yev's plate and started cutting up his pancakes then he added a little bit of syrup_.

 

 _"Are we going to the park today?" The dark haired boy asked then shoved two big bites of pancakes into his mouth, staring at his parents with wide eyes_.

 

" _Aye! Slow it down. You'll fucking choke. Jesus Christ." Mickey muttered and grabbed a napkin, wiping his son's face_.

 

 _"Yevgeny." Svetlana scolded and leaned over, cutting his pancakes into even smaller pieces_.

 

 _"Sowwie mama. Sowwie papa." Yev said and grabbed his sippy cup and took a big gulp of milk_.

 

 _After they finished breakfast and got changed, they headed to the park and settled down beside a big oak tree_.

 

"Y _evvy, make sure that one of us can see you, okay?" Ian said in a gentle voice and leaned against the tree. He didn't think that he's ever been this happy in his entire life. He had his own little family now and that included Svetlana. There was a time when they hated each other. She had taken so much from him, but they were much better now, though. They had a cozy life. Sure, they were still living on the South side but they all made enough to afford a five bedroom home and they were able to have a savings account. Ian was the only one with a legit job as a paramedic. Mickey and Lana still ran the whore house but Lana wasn't a pro anymore. She kept the girls in line and made sure they had what they needed. It wasn't ideal but they were stable. He managed to get Mickey, Svetlana and Yev on his health and dental insurance. They were all set._

 

" _You in there?" Mickey placed a hand on Ian's thigh, grinning at him. "What are you thinking so fucking hard about?"_

 

 _Ian looked at his husband and smiled, crossing his arms over his chest. "I'm just happy. We finally have a good life. We're both on good terms with all of our siblings. Yev is healthy and happy, we have a nice house and we have a baby on the way... A planned baby. Life is wonderful._ "

 

 _"You know... It really is. We're stable. We've never been stable before. It's a nice feeling. And who would have thought that we would plan for a baby." He chuckled and knocked his knee against Ian's_.

 

_"We have everything together," Ian said then scrunched up his face. "Holy fuck, we are adults. Huh. Who would have thought." The one thing that he really loved about his relationship with Mickey was that they didn't always have to talk. When he was younger, he always have to say something, always had to fill the silence with some kind of chatter. Now, not so much. Things changed over the past five years. They were happy. This is how it should have always been._

 

" _Who woulda." Mickey echoed_.

 

                      **********

 

_Ian flopped down on their king size bed and groaned loudly, closing his eyes. "I feel like I haven't slept in days."_

 

 _He mumbled, curling up against Mickey's side. "Well, it had been a long day. Fucking chasing after blue eyes all god damn day." Mickey grumbled and wrapped his arms around the red head_.

 

"Ian... Come on, monkey. Wake up. We need you."

 

 _Ian lifted his head and looked around. That sounded like... Fiona? What the fuck_.

 

"Come on, man. Please wake up."

 

_"Do you hear that?" He asked and looked at Mickey, frowning slightly._

 

_"Hear what?"_

 

 _"Nothing, never mind." The red head said and laid his head back down against the pillow_.

 

 "Ian?"

 

"Orange boy. Enough with this shit."

 

 _The voices were getting more and more frequent. They sounded like his family. Maybe he was finally going crazy_.

 

"Firecrotch."

 

_What the actual fuck?_

 

"Look! His fingers."

 

"Come back to me, Gallagher."

 

                     *************

 

He felt like he'd been asleep for weeks. His eyes were crusted and his body was stiff, his muscles aching. Where was he? This wasn't his bedroom. What the fuck was that beeping noise?

 

"Come on, sweet cheeks. Open your eyes for us." Fiona cooed and lightly rubbed her thumb against the back of Ian's hand.

 

"There you are." Lip said softly as Ian opened his eyes, wincing slightly as the bright light almost blinded him.

 

"Wh-" He tried to speak but nothing came out besides a few grunting sounds. Once the room came into focus, he saw that his family was around him. He smiled graciously at Debbie as she gave him some water to sip on.

 

"What happened?" He was able to finally ask, grunting slightly, tying to clear his throat.

 

"Well... Uhm. You tried to kill yourself." Fiona said quietly.

 

Ian racked his brain, trying to remember but he came up with nothing. The last thing he could remember was that he had to take Debbie and Franny to the doctors. That was...April 10th, maybe? Perhaps it was earlier than that. He wasn't exactly sure.

 

"Look who's finally decided to join us!" An older gentleman who Ian assumed was the doctor teased. "I'm Doctor Davis. How are you feeling?" He asked and smiled brightly at everyone in the room.

 

"I'm feeling okay. A little tired and kind of still and sore. A little fuzzy, too. I-I... What day is it?" He asked, trying to make sense of things.

 

"You will feel a bit fuzzy for a while. We'll give you something to help with the stiffness. We will also get you out of bed later today and walk you around. Physical therapy will come by and help you out. We're going to come up with a plan to get you out of here. I'm sure your family misses having you at home. Oh; today is July 20th. You've been here for about a month. Don't worry though, you'll be on your feet in no time." Doctor Davis said, gently patting Ian on the shoulder. "For now, we're going to give you something to sleep. Your body still needs to heal."

 

Ian looked around the room once more as the nurse gave him something through his IV. His eyes went over every person before he stopped abruptly, locking eyes with the one person that he didn't think he would see again: Mickey. His Mickey. What? "Mick..." He slurred out before everything went dark.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Twitter and tumblr for updates!   
> Twitter- @maddiedarr92 I update when stories will be published and what's next. Also post pictures I've put together 
> 
> Tumblr- maddiemichelle92


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